McGuire Hates Montreal; Ryan Adams Doesn't

Monday September 24 10:45 PM

So now even Pierre McGuire says the Canadiens won't make the playoffs. During his 5:25 hit today Pierre gave us his list of playoff teams in the eastern conference, as part of a TSN project:

1. Ottawa
2. NY Rangers
3. Carolina (wins Southeast)
4. Pittsburgh
5. Philadelphia
6. NJ Devils
7. Buffalo
8. ?

Pierre wouldn't tell us who he picked for 8th, other than to say it was a "darkhorse". Not Florida. And not Montreal. There, further proof that the Montreal- born and raised McGuire hates the Habs.

Somewhere along the way being a die-hard Canadiens fan meant acting like a Leafs fan, taking every perceived slight or criticism of their team oh so personally. Maybe it's just an extension of the in-game experience at the always sold out Bell Center. (Remember making fun of those Leafs fans who kept showing up at Maple Leaf Gardens year after year while they're team finished out of the playoffs or were quickly eliminated? Still find it funny?) Treat the customer like it's the first game they've ever been to and they start acting like hockey newbies.

McGuire thinks Cristobal Huet is playing over his head. Lambaste him. McGuire thinks Sheldon Souray has trouble in his own end. Crucify him. McGuire think Guilluame Latendresse should have been sent back to Junior. Ridicule him. McGuire thinks the Habs are in for a losing season. Fire him!

I'll make my picks next week. How I think the Habs finish will depend on the make up of the final roster. In the meantime, contrary to current popular opinion, here are a few reasons why I believe the Canadiens might make the playoffs:

Alex Kovalev will score more than 47 points.
Chris Higgins won't miss over 20 games.
Andrei Markov moves into legit #1 defenseman territory.
Mike Komisarek picks up where he left off a year ago. So does Thomas Plekanic.
Bryan Smolinski is better than Radek Bonk.
Roman Hamrlik is better than Sheldon Souray.
Tom Kostoplous is more valuable than Mike Johnson.
Michael Ryder is a free agent-to-be.
Sergei Samsanov is in Chicago.
The coaching staff-with 0 days of previous head coaching experience a year ago-will be better.
A nasty virus won't re-emerge at Christmas time.
Key players (especially captain Koivu) won't take nearly as many penalties in the offensive zone.
Andrei Kostitsyn will show why he was selected 10th overall in the 2003 draft.

What about the loss of Souray on the power play? I'll get to that more in-depth next week. But of the 19 power play goals that he takes to Edmonton with him, do you think the Canadiens get absolutely nothing back?

Once again this year we at Melnick in the Afternoon are offering the opportunity of a lifetime for an enterprising business type who loves his or her Habs. The chance to sponsor a segment, small as it might be, every afternoon at 5:15 called "Michel Bergeron can kiss Saku Koivu's ass".
Please send an e-mail to drive@team990.com addressed to me. Imagine. Everyday during the hockey season and the playoffs you'll get to hear me say, "Michel Bergeron can kiss Saku Koivu's ass! Brought to you by (your company)". Don't wait.

Red Sox-Yankees. Yankees-Red Sox. Yankees-Angels. Red Sox-Angels. Ho-Hum.
Sorry but even as a Red Sox fan I want to see the Cleveland Indians win the world series. I've seen my miracle Red Sox season. I can wait a little longer for a second. Cleveland fans have been waiting since 1948.

http://www.baseball-reference.com/teams/CLE/1948.shtml

Plus it would give the rest of the world a chance to see so many terrific players they know so little about including Victor Martinez, Ryan Garko, Jhonny Peralta, Franklin Gutierrez, Casey Blake, Fausto Carmona, Rafael Perez, Rafael Betancourt (5-1, 1.41, 76 IP, 49 H, 9 BB, 75 K!) and the best former Expo never to play for the Expos Grady Sizemore. Difficult as it might be to think that a team who's closer is Joe Borowski can get by Jonathan Papelbon, Mariano Rivera or Fransisco Rodriguez but stranger things have happened. And if the Cubs can win the NLCS in search of their first world series win since 1908 then we'd really have something to talk about. A world series featuring the two worst closers in modern history (Borowski-a former Cub & Ryan Dempster). Anybody seen Steve Bartman lately?

Ben Cahoon tells Herb Zurkowsky there are "in-house issues" affecting the Alouettes moments after they lose their second straight game to a very mediocre Edmonton Eskimos team and VP & GM & Head Coach Jim Popp questions the play calling of his offensive co-oridnator and two days after Herb reported that Don Matthews had been in town as a guest of owner Robert Wettenhall, something Popp was not aware of until questioned about it by Herb. There's no smoke here. It's a full blown fire. And Robert Wettenhall will not watch his team go up in flames while getting ready to add 5,000 new seats to Molson Stadium. Not Surprisingly Zurkowsky thinks re-hiring Matthews is a terrible idea.

http://communities.canada.com/montrealgazette/blogs/thesnap/default.aspx

For all those in the Montreal media (and I mean all) who couldn't stand the guy (continuously harping on Matthews as if the fans cared about their problems dealing with him) I ask, now what? There too likely goes your Grey Cup expense account.

It was so good to see singer-songwriter Ryan Adams in a positive frame of mind last wednesday in a (at least) one-third empty Theatre St. Denis. Perhaps put-off by his last performance at The Spectrum (puffing away madly on cigarettes when he wasn't downing Beaujolais right out of the bottle and challenging the obligatory idiot who yelled out "Summer of '69!") or competition from Rilo Kiley across town at La Tulipe not enough music fans came out to watch the newly straight and sober Adams with his group The Cardinals ("Our group" says Adams. "I'll never be a solo act again"). Pity. The sound was as pristine as I've ever heard in the place while Adams' voice soared to new heights. After jamming out on "Beautiful Sorta" Adams announced that his underwear had snuck up into his crack making the jam a little difficult. Yes, he was in a playful mood, describing his off-day browsing in a french bookstore, poking fun at himself "Not that I'd know what it's like to perform on stage on drugs and alcohol" and riffing hysterically on Bon Jovi and a massive leather jacket (you had to be there). Most of it all it was about the songs. Delivered with passion and focus including "Off Broadway" and "Goodnight Rose" from Easy Tiger, "Peaceful Valley", "Dear John", "Magnolia Mountain", "Cold Roses" solo at the piano versions of "Sylvia Plath" and "Sweet L'il Gal" plus, among others "Rescue Blues" and "Goodnight Hollywood Boulevard".
Here's hoping his daily speedballs are gone forever. As a singer-songwriter-guitarist and bandleader I can think of only Jack White and Jeff Tweedy who can rival Adams among the under 40 crowd in rock and roll. We need them.
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/17/arts/music/17decu.html

The Cro Flies in; Briere Flies South

Wednesday September 12 8:00 PM

Warren Cromartie aka "Chief Running Mouth" has been in Montreal all week...in studio with me everyday at three...what a treat...Cro deserves a lot of credit for trying to revive the Expos fantasy camp....Mike Stenhouse ran it from 1993-1997....I was fortunate enough to be a part of all of them....winning the Cy Young award in year one....the entire experience was an absolute joy....if you've always wanted to check one out it looks like you'll be able to do so this january....Cro and his friends (including Stenhouse) are THIS close to finalizing plans....please stay tuned to The Team 990 for a chance to win a coveted spot to the camp...in the meantime, if you have any questions at all send Cro an email at warrencromartie49@yahoo.com

This just in: Daniele Briere says he didn't sign with the Canadiens because there are too many french people in Montreal while player agent Bob Perno says Saku Koivu is a "cancer" in the room....

Quite a start to the NFl season, huh? Randy Moss and Terrell Owens combine for 15 receptions for 270 yards (that's 18 yards a catch) and 3 td's..wonder what Keyshawn Johnson was thinking?...Shaun Alexander (105 yrds rushing) serves notice that he's healthy while LaDainien Tomlinson shows-again-that he can beat you in more ways than any other player in the league with 7 receptions and an all-important TD pass in a tight win over the Bears....LT's Passing rating for the day-158.3....passing rating for his career (8-11 with 7 TD's)-154.4'...I know the Chargers are a strong pick by many to win the AFC but really, unless Peyton Manning tears up his knee or Bill Belichick joins the CIA can you really see a team coached by Norv Turner get past Belichick or Tony Dungy?...Personally I'm rooting for Manning, hoping to see Peyton win again while Eli at least comes close...Eli will do his part but it looks like he'll need help from a few retired Giants not named Tiki Barber...(Everson Walls, Pepper Martin, Lawrence Taylor...)..I'm also rooting for Brett Favre, Carson Palmer, Donovan McNabb, J.P. Losman and the New Orleans Saints...Losman? Check out final item in Peter King's column last week:

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2007/writers/peter_king/09/04/letters/2.html

Now, more than ever, we need more stories like the one about Losman. Which naturally brings us to Michael Vick and our leading contender for e-mail of the year:

Subject: Vick goin bye bye
Mitch;
Last Friday I returned from an extended sabbatical as a guest of the New York State Department of Corrections in beautiful downtown Altona N.Y. Fortunately Altona is close enough to the border that 990 comes in loud and clear. On Tuesday the 14th, all of cell block "C" rejoiced to here the news that Andie Bennett loves her "Bangs," there are now 8 guys willing to accommodate her as soon as they're paroled. Except for "Little Guido" who wants to give Rod Francis a pedicure and facial. With what I've learned I feel qualified to give Michael Vick some free advice for his up coming hiatus. The top ten pearls of wisdom:

10. Start smoking, cigarettes are like money.
9. Never call a screw a "screw".
8. Devout Muslims and Orthodox Jews eat better.
7. If offered a "Milkbone" decline.
6. Those women who look like Cher, Liza Minelli and Madonna are not.
5. Cock fighting isn't what you think it is.
4. "The Longest Yard" is just a movie.
3. Avoid prison rodeos, especially "bareback riding".
2. Learn to "moonwalk" in the shower.
1. Don't forget to set your TiVo before you leave.


R.K. Kahnawake (via Altona)

This just in: Daniele Briere says he signed with the Flyers instead of the Habs because he prefers hoagies to smoked meat...must be Koivu's fault...an unnamed agent claims Koivu had no intention of ever taking Briere to Schwartz's...

Feeling Nostalgic

Wednesday Sept 5 7:45 PM

You know what say about nostalgia-it never goes out of style.

I was reminded recently by Elliott Price that we had just passed a significant date in our broadcasting careers. We did our first on-air gig together 25 years ago last month.

I was hired by Jeff Rimer at CFCF-radio in september of 1981, just in time to (kind of) experience Blue Monday (chronicled in an earlier but no longer available blog-I've since learned how to save- but rescuscitated here (after a frantic google search) for your enjoyment:

http://www.baseball-fever.com/showthread.php?t=52831

By the spring of '82 I had established myself as a talented smart-ass who still sounded several gallons of whiskey and hundreds of cartons of cigarettes away from having any kind of depth to my voice. But I brought an attitude into the booth and pressbox shaped not by what teams or players wanted me to say but having grown up watching and reading Howard Cosell and Jim Bouton and listening to talk shows, especially south of the border, that featured hosts who were outspoken. Here in Montreal Ted Tevan ruled the airwaves, hardly a yes man to anybody. So I had an attitude that rubbed some older members of the media the wrong way but those who took the time to listen realized that I had the smarts, and most importantly, the passion, to go with the attitude. Bob Dunn was one of those guys.

Dunn had been an Expos beat writer who later became the sports director at CJAD where they were attempting to re-build the sports department and "get younger" (some things never change). He had already hired a young kid from Ontario who sounded even squeakier than I did but who was clearly on the fast track to a newtork job. His name was Chris Cuthbert.

I was told to phone Dunn (quick lesson on negotiating from strength: let them call you) which I did that June. I was hired only after he agreed to bump my starting salary to a more reasonable
$14, 500. I was late for my first shift (co-hosting a show called "Sunday Morning Sportspage") but hey, as Larry Parrish once said, "I was single, in my early 20's and living in downtown Montreal...") but smoothed things over the following monday. It was the first week of july. On my way out for lunch I walked out of the Fort street elevator right passed a young guy with an even bigger head of curls than mine. Later, I was told that Bob had just hired somebody from Regina to fill out the department. A native Montrealer who was described to me just as that guy I had passed in the elevator. Name was Elliott Price.

Elliott and I first appeared on the air together in August of 1982. There was instant chemistry. We came from similar backgrounds although he had to go the Maritimes to do a country music show (Haggard rules!) before driving out to Regina for what he promised that station manager would be a long term arrangement. Three days later he was on his way back to Montreal. Thankfully, I never had to leave town, cutting my teeth at CKO Radio, before heading back to school, then a cross-continent trip during the baseball strike of 1981 and eventually to CFCF.

In August of 1982 The Expos had gone through umpteen second basemen while trying to replace Rodney Scott (Wallace Johnson, Mike Gates, Frank Taveras, Tim Raines (yes-Raines), Bryan Little, Joel Youngblood and Mike Phillips) before finally settling on Doug Flynn. And a few southpaws trying to replace Bill Lee (Randy Lerch anyone? Tom Gorman? Dave Tomlin? Chris Welch in '83) before finally re-acquiring Dan Schatzeder. The so-called Team of the 80's was falling apart. It didn't take long for Dunn's boys to go after the culprits, namely John McHale and Jim Fanning.

Professional soccer was "the next big thing" in North America in the 1970's thanks to the New York Cosmos and the North American Soccer league. In the summer of '82 The Montreal Manic
were into its second season after a move from Philadelphia. With former Cosmos coach Eddie Firmani leading the way, the Manic, bankrolled by Molson's, appeared on solid ground averaging over 21 thousand fans a game at Olympic Stadium. Chris Cuthbert was the radio voice of the franchise, occasionally calling games in front of over 55,000 fans.

Montreal's CFL franchise in 1982 was actually known as the Concordes. The Alouettes died following the 1981 season when Nelson Skalbania tried to buy a Grey Cup by importing NFL stars Vince Ferragamo, James Scott and Billy "White Shoes" Johnson. As was the case with baseball in 1968, Charles Bronfman came to the rescue and in august of '82 the franchise seemed as solid in Montreal as baseball itself.

In the summer of '82 the Montreal Canadiens were coached by Bob Berry who would spend many a post game media session slumped on a chair in his office, head down, puffing on cigarettes (usually bummed off Elliott or Randy Tieman) while waiting for the 5-6 reporters to finish up so he could head up to DJ's on Crescent for a couple of drinks and a lot more (bummed) cigarettes. Berry had reason to stress. Even though the '82 Habs featured Lafleur, Shutt, Robinson, Lapointe and Gainey the magic of the late 70's was clearly gone. Their leading scorer was Keith Acton. The goaltending, two years removed from the Ken Dryden era, was merely adequate (Rick Wamsley, Denis Herron, Richard Sevigny). And Doug Wickenheiser, drafted instead of Denis Savard in 1980, had scored a total of 19 goals in his first two seasons while Savard's 81-82 season produced 119 points for Chicago. But surely help was on the way in 1982-83 after Irving Grundman's staff, with its first two selections, drafted Alain Heroux and Jocelyn Gauvreau. By the end of the season Berry and Grundman (and his staff including Ron Caron) were gone. And the Ron Corey era would begin.

We've seen a lot, Elliott and I in the last 25 years. Covered most of it. Would have made a good full time radio team if only radio execs had more of "that vision thang" that Bob Dunn had way back then. We've been roommates, radio opponents, brief adversaries and finally on air partners once again during the last two years of the Expos. Somewhere along the way we also became related. Didn't really need a marriage to make that happen. We've been brothers since August of 1982.

1982 Habs & Expos you might have forgotten about:

Jeff Brubaker, Dan Daoust, Yvan Joly, Bill Kitchen, Mark Holden, John Newberry, Dave Orleski, Bill Root, Dwight Schofield; Terry Francona, Brad Mills, Tim Blackwell, Brad Gulden, Bob James,Roy Johnson, Dan Norman, Chris Smith.

Nostalgia-it ain't what it used to be.